Welcome, to the wild and whiffy world of my midlife metamorphosis. Yes, you read that right. Today, we’re diving nose-first into the pungent paradox that is my menopausal body odour. And trust me, it’s not your typical Eau de Sweat.
The Scent of Surprise
Imagine this: you're minding your own business, maybe even feeling a bit zen after surviving another round of night sweats. Then, out of nowhere, a swift sniff of something…unmistakably cabbage-like hits you. Yes, cabbage. That cruciferous culinary delight has apparently decided to take up residence.
I know what you’re thinking. Maybe your senses are just playing tricks on you?
Maybe you’ve been cooking a lot of stir fry?
But no, this vegetal vexation is real and relentless. I am officially Eau de Coleslaw.
An Outing Gone Awry
Let me take you back to yesterday. I dared to venture out of my cabbage cocoon to visit a relative in the hospital. A mere two-hour outing, but one that left me utterly drained, just exhausted enough to collapse into bed as soon as I returned home.
There I was, sprawled out, thinking I was on the mend from this peculiar phase. Then, out of the blue, the whiff of wilted cabbage hits me again. In my own bed! How is this possible?
Did I roll around in a patch of Brussels sprouts in my sleep?
The Frustrations of Recovery
The real kicker here is that I’m supposed to be recovering, right? Taking it easy, healing, rejuvenating. Instead, I feel like that forgotten box of mushrooms in the fridge – neglected, stationary, and slightly questionable in smell. I’m housebound and, apparently, olfactorily offensive.
My husband hasn’t mentioned a thing about this new eau de veggie, and no one else has said I smell either. Could it be that my sense of smell is off? Or are they just being polite?
Either way, I’m left to navigate this aromatic adventure solo.
Embracing the Odour
But let’s find the silver lining, shall we? If menopause has decided to gift me with a unique scent signature, I might as well own it. Who else can boast of smelling like the produce aisle? I could start a trend! ‘Eau de Brassica’ could be the next big thing in artisanal perfumes. Move over, Chanel No. 5.
So, there you have it. Menopause has not only thrown my hormones into havoc but has also bestowed upon me the dubious distinction of being cabbage-scented. But hey, life is about embracing the unexpected, right? Whether it's surprise scents or sudden naps, I'm rolling with it – one whiff at a time.
Question
Have you ever experienced a strange or unexpected body odour?
How did you handle it, and did anyone else notice or mention it?
Share your stories in the comments below!
Until next time, stay fresh (or at least try to),
Meno-Mirth Michaela
P.S. If you see me in public, just smile and pretend you don’t smell the coleslaw. We all have our quirks!
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